What We Don’t Know About Parenting
We don’t know everything about parenting. We never will. But that’s okay because parenting is a journey, not a destination. And on that journey, we learn and grow as much as our children do. One of the most important things we can do as parents are to stay open to learning. With that in mind, here are some things we may not know about parenting, but should:
1. There is no one right way to parent.
Every parent and every child are individual people. There is no one technique to raise a child that is perfect. One family’s method of operation may not be suitable for another’s. The most important thing is to identify what works best for you and your family.
Learn from others. If you are having trouble with your child’s behavior, ask someone in your life who has raised a well-behaved child. You can also read books or watch videos that may help you learn how to approach your child’s behavior. Try not to be too hard on yourself, too quick to condemn your own parenting, or too quick to try to control or change your child.
As a parent, I want to raise well-adjusted children who will grow up to be strong, moral, compassionate, and independent people. I also want my children to feel that they are loved and valued. Children are born with certain traits, such as their temperament. Some children will be extroverts, others introverts. Some children may be tolerant of stress, and some may be very upset by it. I know that parenting is hard, and I am fully aware that I do not have all the answers.
There is no magic potion or trick for parenting, except to love your child and to try to instill good values in your child. It is not easy. Parents are human, and they will make mistakes. However, all parents have the ability to love their children and to teach their children moral and spiritual values.
2. Parenting is hard work.
One of the most gratifying and hardest tasks you’ll ever take on is becoming a parent. There are moments when it can be tiresome and frustrating. But it can also be incredibly rewarding, joyful, and fulfilling. When it comes to parenting, you are not alone. Your child will feel your every emotion—the good, the bad, and the ugly. Your child is wired to love you unconditionally and to mirror your emotions.
When you’re sleep-deprived, it can feel like your brain is a stranger. Whether you have trouble falling asleep or staying asleep, chronic insomnia can affect your mood, concentration, productivity, and daytime alertness. Most people have experienced the foggy, low energy, brain fog side of insomnia – but what about the opposite side? What is one of the biggest myths about insomnia?
How many times have you told your child to stay away from the ice cream or cookie they are licking? How many times have you told your child to stay away from the cake before it is cut, you are trying to make it and they are going to have some of it whether you want them to or not?
It’s hard to be angry when you’re a parent, but you should not take it out on your kids. When your anger is out of control, it can have serious and long-lasting consequences for your relationships and for the way you treat your child.
In order for children to fully develop as human beings, they must master several developmental skills. Mastering skills requires practice, lots of practice. It is common for children to get bored and feel the need to “do something else” or “play” when asked to play with a specific toy. This behavior is natural, especially if you’ve just asked them to do a lot of different things during the same play session. You can help make playtime more effective and enjoyable for your child by breaking down tasks.
3. You will make mistakes.
No one is perfect, and that includes parents. You will make mistakes, and that’s okay. What’s important is that you learn from your mistakes and do your best to not repeat them.
To me, what’s more, important than making mistakes is learning from them. Learning what not to do next time is key. Mistakes are an opportunity to try things you’ve never done before. You gain experiences and insights that will help you in the future.
And no matter what mistakes you make along the way, the important thing to remember is that you’re learning from them. Don’t beat yourself up. Instead, identify the areas in which you messed up and find ways to get better at them.
4. Your children will make mistakes.
Just as you will make mistakes, so will your children. They are human beings, after all. It’s important to remember that their mistakes are not a reflection of you as a parent. They are simply a part of growing up. You could be the most loving, attentive, and involved mother in the world, and your child could still make some poor choices. That isn’t your job as a mom. Your job is to guide and empower her to make good decisions.
It’s very easy to judge other parents on things they do or don’t do with their children, but we all have different ways of going about parenting. Don’t worry about what other people think. Be the best possible parent for your child.
When all else fails, just laugh it off. We all do it. We all fail our children in one way or another. What matters is that we learn from those failures, and move on to do better.
5. parenting is a lifelong commitment.
As a parent, you’re in this for the long haul. It’s a commitment for the rest of your life. As a parent, you are obligated to raise your children until they are adults. If you think that’s a long time, you’d be mistaken. Make the most of every second. It’s not so long since you start. And it’s not so short when your kids grow up and move out.
My daughter was born in August, and I vividly remember putting her in my arms and thinking what on earth am I going to do here. She’s now 20 leaving university and looking back, it’s hard to believe how much and how fast time has passed.
6. There is no such thing as a perfect parent.
There is no such thing as a perfect parent. We all have our own unique parenting styles and methods. The important thing is to be the best parent you can be. Be patient, love your children unconditionally, and set a good example for them to follow.
There will be times when you make mistakes, but that’s okay. Just learn from them and do better next time. Your children are lucky to have you as their parents. You are doing a great job!
Otherwise, you wouldn’t be reading, keep up the good work!
7. You will never be done learning about parenting.
Being a parent is a lifelong learning experience. It’s a subject you’ll never be able to master. There’s always something fresh to learn and something new to overcome. Take a deep breath, relax, and embrace the journey along the way.
New parents often feel like they need to prove themselves. Your child will never judge you on your success as a parent. They will simply love you. This love will endure through all of your mistakes. Learning to accept this truth can relieve some of the pressure on new moms and dads.
A Few more gems
Another great way to help parent our children is to read them stories every night which cover moral and ethical situations humans get faced with. We can then prepare them for how best to respond and how to deal with them. I wrote a great book to help with 22 moral values each tied into a quick short story, check it out: https://lewis-anderson.com/NurturingKindness
Your relationship with your child will mature over time.
There’s a big difference between parenting a newborn versus a teenager. All aspects of your relationship with your children will evolve and grow. Although this evolution can be painful at times, it’s necessary. You can keep your relationship healthy by doing all the things you loved doing with your child during the first months and years of their life.
Parenting is an amazing gift.
If you’re reading this article, you likely already have a child. In addition, you have a passion for helping other people. There is no better way to help another person than to give that individual the gift of life.
Care about your baby more than you care about yourself. Inevitably, you’ll have moments of exhaustion, frustration, and anxiety. It’s hard to be an active parent and take care of yourself. There’s nothing wrong with asking for help. That’s what partners, grandparents, and friends are supposed to be for.
Thanks for reading, I hope you enjoyed it. Please come back for more great content.
Please don’t forget to check out my book: https://lewis-anderson.com/NurturingKindness